The fantasy ends

The Chisled Nibler year has ended. No championship. No money. Not even a playoff victory. I finish my season with a 9-4 record, ranked 3rd in the league, #1 in points and I lose my first round game to a 6th ranked 6-8 team. Lovely!

For those wondering, I'm talking about fantasy football. Better yet, I'm talking about my failed attempt at making some money off my vast wealth of sports knowledge. So much for watching all those games and reading all those fantasy columns. In the end, my team was a bust. My sports intellect was thrown out the door and my pride was crushed the moment T.O. ran his mouth one too many times.

But seriously kids, this was my first jump into the world of fantasy sports. And overall, it was quite fun and entertaining. My team went on quite a tear through the mid-season and it looked like the Nib wouldn't be stopped. I even had teams that were way out of contention trading me their top players. But as soon as I started thinking I knew what I was doing, my players went MIA in critical games.

QB Peyton Manning - Was solid most of the season. But when I needed him to come up big for my first playoff game, he gives me two interceptions and only 8 points. Definitely not the fantasy player of years past.

WR Chad Johnson - Looked unstoppable mid-way through the year. Gave me a solid effort this past weekend with 9 points. But only earned me 3 points the previous two games. Houshmandzadeh started stealing some of his thunder and will likely be the fantasy star from Cincy through the playoffs and next year.

WR Santana Moss - I traded Oakland's Jerry Porter for Moss, as he was the top receiver for Washington and averaged over 10 pts a game. He gives me 7 points the last three games. Dude, go back to "The U".

WR Lee Evans - I pick up this dude after he scores 3 TDs against Miami. Guess what he does after I sign him...88-yards in two games with 0 TDs. Read that one again...zero touchdowns. They don't have a ton of weapons up there in Buffalo...surely they could have found a way to get the guy the ball.

RB Mike Anderson and LaMont Jordan - No complaints this week, but they seemed to go MIA the previous two. Not like that mattered when it came down to one playoff game. I'd go with them againt next year...that is if Oakland fires Norv Turner and finds someone who will committ to the running game.

TE Jason Whitten - This guy was to be one of the top TEs in the league. Someone better get them a QB in Dallas, cause Whitten and Keyshaun were busts the second half of the season.

K Lawrence Tynes - This was one of my most solid players all year. Until my playoff game. I'd go with him again though.

D Atlanta - Should have been much better than advertised. They even gave me some good points early in the season. But as with the rest of my team, they took a wrong turn to the stadium the past 4 weeks and ended up at a bar in Bayonne. God only knows when they will return.

So as it goes, it doesn't really matter what you know when it comes to fantasy sports. Pick some guys, go with it, and hopefully you'll get lucky. I seem to remember a girl in my office a few years back winning an office poll because she picked teams with the coolest names.

So next year, I'm gonna draft Porkchop Womack #1 in my fantasy team and run with it.

posted by DVS @ 7:25 PM